Hope, Healing and HIV: Reflections from the Families’ Weekend

Angelina Namiba – Chiva Associate from the 4M network of Mentor Mothers

The fourth Chiva Families’ Weekend took place from 3 – 5 October in the beautiful, tranquil Welsh countryside. 13 family groups comprising of 29 young people aged between 1 and 23 attended the residential

These retreats aim to give families the space to share stories and strategies of living well with HIV together, to explore how to improve family communication about HIV, and also, most importantly, to allow for some much-needed self-care and wellbeing activities.

For many of the families, this is the main opportunity for them to get away and spend quality time as a family unit.

10 families attended for the first time and 3 families attended for the second time. This included a record number of 9 dads/male carers. Families who attended for a second time benefited from continued support and they were also able to informally support new families who might be anxious about attending the event for the first time. Returnees encouraged and reassured peers both in terms of what to expect, as well as the potential benefits and support available throughout the weekend.

Chiva staff & Associates, a Trustee and two wonderful creche volunteers facilitated the weekend.

The welcome and introductory session included the Family Reflections Tree, which started with families sharing how they were feeling at the start of the weekend. These thoughts were placed on a special tree that is used to chart growth throughout the weekend.

This was followed by a joint Family Art Workshop – My Family Story – where families created colourfully painted flags depicting the story of their families. Families shared feedback to the main group about their flags and about their stories and journeys.

This was incredibly moving as families shared powerful testimonies of their journeys with HIV so far.

Many of the parents who shared their journeys had never spoken to others about their experiences, and there were many tears shed during this session. But participants encouraged each other. Showing that despite feeling anxious about being in a new place and with strangers, families still felt safe and supported enough to share their experiences.

This was followed by a joint family session on: Building Stronger Conversations at Home. Using conversation prompts. Families took time to reflect on different aspects of being a family, including what makes them happy, what HIV means to them as a family, their achievements, strengths and what makes them hopeful for the future.

Workshop options for parents/carers included: creating resources to support naming HIV to children; supporting children with additional needs; welfare rights/Immigration information and managing healthcare appointments.

Wellbeing workshop options included: mindfulness and pebble painting; time for chats; creative reflections and hopes for the future and a creative writing/journalising session using the book Our Stories Told By Us – a guide for people to explore their story. Participant got a copy of the guided journal to take home and continue writing.

We also had a lovely family group nature walk, taking in the beautiful countryside.

Activities for the children and young people included swimming, golf discs, badminton, pool, volleyball, and indoor board games, depending on weather conditions.

Additional family activities included a movie night, where we screened two short films, Love ends stigma, produced by the Naz Project London. This film features interviews with seven activists, gardeners, creatives, mothers, and authors, all living with HIV, as they have open conversations with their loved ones about sharing their HIV status, relationships and navigating life with HIV. The second film screened was Chiva’s award-winning film, Safe With Me, which follows the story of two young people who make a connection at Chiva’s summer camp.

Both films were very powerful and moving, and to lighten the mood, the screenings were followed by a karaoke session, once facilitated by DJs Bex on the decks and Ange on the mic. This proved very popular with children, young people and parents, all getting involved, not only in the singing, but in dancing and cheering on singers as they took to the mic.

Some feedback from the weekend and the different sessions below

‘It has been a good time at camp. I enjoyed spending time with other families, building connections and learning new things. It felt so good to be fully immersed in authentic self.’ Parent/carer attendee

‘I am so HAPPY! I had so much fun coming here, I made friends and played with them and I enjoyed the view.’ Child attendee

‘This weekend has been enjoyable and meaningful. I have loved learning from different families. I have had lots of special moments with my family.’ Parent/carer attendee

‘I really enjoyed the session. I had not done journaling before and I found it really useful. I really like the book we were given with prompts, and I intend to continue writing in my journal’. Parent/carer attendee

Once again, I would personally like to say another huge thank you to Chiva for continuing to provide this much needed, appreciated and valued space for families and for walking alongside families and giving hope and support, where oftentimes there isn’t much. Extra special thanks to the funders for enabling this incredible space which positively impacts on the lives of many families.