It can be a dilemma deciding whether to talk to your school about HIV in your family.
Many people decide not to. As discussed on the rights at school and university page, under the law, schools do not need to know about anyone’s HIV status, including staff, pupils, and pupils’ families. You are not obliged to tell them.
But letting them know about the HIV in your family could have its advantages. It’s good to be able to explain why you might miss school, get behind with your work, or struggle with your mental health, for example. And if you do share your HIV status, under the law they must keep the information confidential and not treat you any differently because of it.
This decision might be best made with a parent or family member.
Advantages of telling school
- The school may be able to support if you or a parent gets sick. You might miss school sometimes, or are unable to complete your homework because of how HIV is affecting you. Or perhaps you need time off for an appointment or to support someone else in your family. A school that knows about HIV can make allowances and be more flexible to ensure you keep up with your work.
2. The school will be able to help you manage your medication on school trips. More on this in the families’ section on Travel and Sleepovers.
3. You may benefit from having someone else outside the family who you can talk openly with. Teachers can be very important people in young people’s lives.
4. The more schools know about pupils living in families affected by HIV and what kind of support they need, the better educated they will become about this issue. This can have a very positive effect, not only on the awareness at your school, but also by helping to build better understanding in the wider population.
5. It might be worth telling the school about HIV even if it’s just your parent who’s affected by the virus. Many schools have experience supporting pupils whose parents have a long-term health condition. A school that knows about HIV in the family could be more understanding and supportive.
Things to think about
If you tell the school, you may be worried the information will not be kept private and other students, parents, or people in the local community will find out.
There are a few examples of schools that have not reacted well when they have found out about HIV in a young person’s family. Often this has been because the information came to them from another source and was not shared in a formal conversation with the parent or carer.
It is important that you are very clear on your rights as a person living with HIV and for you to feel you have control over the information shared. Read more in the rights at school and university page. You can also refer to the HIV in Schools guidance, particularly the section on information sharing and confidentiality (p.25).
If the school were to treat you or a parent less favourably after they know you are living with HIV, they would be breaking the law. If this happened, you could seek advice from a lawyer and the school could be taken to court and charged with discrimination under the Equality Act.
Teachers need to understand that HIV poses no risk to others and that they should treat all medical information confidentially, including storing information securely and not sharing it with any others without your permission.
Read advice for parents and carers on how to tell school
If you and your parent or carer decide to go ahead and tell the school, find some advice here on how to approach this conversation and the support available.
Find guides and information for teachers and school staff
We have guidance for teachers and education staff on HIV. It might be useful to share this and go through it together if you choose to tell them about your HIV.
